In today's video, I'm going to tell you how this book made me a better husband.
Hi! Welcome to this new personal development video from Français Authentique. And on this channel, we talk a lot about developing ourselves, trying to become better people.
And today I would like to talk about a topic that is super important, which is becoming a better husband or wife, because it is obvious that it is very difficult to be happy if you are not happy in your relationship. There is a little proverb in English, which I find very nice, which says: "Happy wife, happy life". So, basically, if our wife is happy, life will be happy. I am sure that for you, ladies, it is the same thing, if your husband is happy, your life will be happy.
And in my particular case, I think it's even more critical because Celine and I work together, which means we spend almost every day together. Even though we each have our own workspace, we spend a lot of time together. And so, it's even more important to have a good relationship.
And I'm really lucky to have always been happy as a couple. Céline and I get along really well, we have the same vision for our future, our priorities, our children's education, etc. So, I'm really lucky, and I'm very grateful for that. But we can always improve, and that's part of it, my marriage, it's really part of the priority things japan whatsapp number data and, therefore, for which I want to improve. I want, in a really directed way, to improve myself, learn things and put in place little habits that will make me a better husband, because once again my family life is my priority. So, being a better husband and a better dad will make me an even happier person.
And in the last few weeks, I've been reading and starting to apply the advice in this book by Gary Chapman, The 5 Love Languages. So, this is the English version of The 5 Love Languages , but in French, so, there's a French translation, Les 5 langues de l'amour. And the subtitle is The Secret to Love that Lasts . We want to make love last. I feel like this advice is relevant and helps me improve my marriage. It can help you too even if you're not married.
This book has sold over 20 million times since '92. And Gary Chapman, he's really a reference when it comes to marriage counseling, how to improve our life as a couple.
The key idea of the book, which is very, very simple, is that we all have a reservoir of love inside us. And this reservoir of love empties when we lack love and it fills up when we receive love. When this reservoir of love is full, we feel loved, we are happy, and when this reservoir of love is empty, well we don't feel loved and we are unhappy. That's the basic principle to keep in mind.
Another key that I discovered in the book that really opened my eyes is that we don't all have the same way of filling this love tank. Depending on our personality, certain actions will fill our love tank, while other actions will be neutral, they will not fill the love tank. So, depending on our personality, our tank will fill from given actions. You'll see, it will become clearer in a moment. Because this is exactly what Gary Chapman calls "love languages." Because this is exactly what Gary Chapman calls "our love languages." The things that will fill our love tank are the things that correspond to our love language, and we don't all have the same language.
He classifies them, in his book, into five categories, and we all have one or two major languages. And these languages, these things, if we receive them, our love tank will fill up. So, I'm going to briefly introduce them to you, these five love languages, and tell you what mine are.
The first love language is words of affirmation. So, someone who has this love language is someone who will feel loved when you compliment them. Words of affirmation are when you recognize that someone is making an effort, when you say nice and positive things to them. So, once again, this is the key, that's why I repeat it. Some people, when you tell them nice things, it won't do anything to them. If it's not their love language, they'll be a little happy, but nothing more. For others, it's key, that is to say that if you never compliment someone who has this love language, words of affirmation, this person will not feel loved. So, first language: words of affirmation.
Second language: quality time. Some people feel loved when they are given quality time: when they are listened to, when they are spent with, when activities, hobbies, outings are organized. These people whose love language is quality time feel loved when things are organized for them and with them.
Third love language: receiving gifts. Well, this is pretty clear. These are people who need to be given gifts to be loved. It's not necessarily about receiving valuable gifts. We're not talking about money here or the monetary aspect, we're really about receiving a gift. Some people feel loved when they receive or when they receive gifts.
Fourth love language: acts of service. Those who have this love language will feel loved when someone does them a favor. And it can be everyday things. Some people, it's going to be, I don't know, if we vacuum, if we do the dishes, if we clean, it's really about showing or at least that's what these people feel, they feel love when they see that we do things for them.
And finally, fifth: physical contact. So, here, it's really the fact that we are taken in the arms, that we are held by the hand, etc. There is not necessarily a sexual connotation in this love language of physical contact, it is really that we are taken by the hand, that we are caressed, etc. That is the fifth love language.